Wish I was strong

Can someone pls tell me why I dont deserve to be happy?

I have no idea how to explain this. Like srsly, I miss you. I loved you. 
And now you dont even care about this................

You go away, leave me like a dumb thinking how on earth Ive done wrong.
Oh please I beg you, just pls tell me what I've done wrong :(

Although i know we cant fix this any more. Just tell me.

You know how much I love you right?
And when you go, half of me died. And I gotta wake up and stand up for myself. And be strong which is really hard. And pretending like there's nothing happened and pretend that I dont feel anything. And it hurts me a lot. 

I'll do this. I'm strong I deserve someone better. Yeah, I can do this! 

The very best part of me

So hi.
Idk where to start.
Here it goes................................................

Last night, you mad at me. And I dont even know what Ive done wrong. I stayed up late and thinking and keep thinking my mistakes towards you. I didnt find the answer. I texted you to say that I'm so sorry if I let you down. In the same time, Idk what Ive done. 
The next afternoon, you texted me to say sorry for what happened. And I asked you what happened. You still didnt wanna tell me. Okay, I dont wanna know. For me, past is past. 
AND I MISS THE OLD YOU. COZ YOU NEVER FAILED TO MAKE ME LAUGH AND SMILE AND HAPPY.
AND POOF! I lost everything. My other half, yes its you. Tell me, why I dont deserve to be happy? Pls tell me why. 
The best part is, to know when you had someone and she likes you too. And I have to act like we didnt know each other. And nothing happened between us. If that what you want, I'll do it for you. Just for you.
Am really really tired of crying :( 

The worst is, I cant do anything. I cant. There's no way to fix this. Yeah, hard to believe this. However, I gotta accept it. 
THERE'S NOTHING HAPPENED BETWEEN YOU AND ME.

Letting go and moving on. 

Well, I'll never regret to meet a guy like you. Because you're the very best part of me.